Milestones x 2

 duh...the superhero needs to be the in the front

Developmental milestones are best left to occur naturally is the decision I have come to...


About two weeks ago J decided one day that he was no longer going to wear pull ups. While I tried to contain my emotions (I was jumping up and down with excitement inside), I calmly said " Oh good idea honey" and practically ran upstairs to get a pair of his big boy underwear---- with super heroes on them of course! He then decided to to wear them to our friend's house for the evening and then went poop in the big boy potty while he was over there....and viola! A potty trained preschooler! He even drove 8 hours to and from grandpops house in CA with no accidents and has gone to preschool now for two days with no accidents either. I am sooooo relieved and thankful we took Dr. Fern's advice with just letting it be.Of course it took us coming up with a cool name, penis pocket/bucket, for the front of the undies  to convince him to wear them the correct way but once again nature has taken it course and life is good.

 and....

brother hang time...

 Aram has started to giggle not just when tickled but when big brother bear does a funny dance--such as the noodle dance, where he wiggles his behind back and forth while eating noodles---you have not tried this, you have to, it is soooo much fun. He also finds it hilarious if you put your face close enough to his and he grabs your nose and when you pull his shirt over his head and say peek a boo. This contagious giggling makes my long days away at work worth every minute of every part of my life. In other words Aram is starting to be aware of others and his surroundings in away that makes play time really fun.

Growing and Growing and Giggles

Every week Aram grows even cuter. He has now discovered his toes and follows J's every move around the room. He also shows interest at looking at faces of other babies...especially Cousin Caden...but the best development is his laugh...see for yourself.

And of course the move still puts J in stitches as well...

Man, daddy you have the touch. Keep em' giggling because it is music to my ears for sure!

Big changes in the family

There have been some big changes in our family this fall. Besides me going back to school, as in working, J started preschool. Little Lights Playschool is a Waldorf-based, 10 kid, in-home preschool where J gets to make bread, be creative, play, read books, and practice being a little being. Olde gets two days with just Aram or at least a few hours for two days with just baby and happily reports how much easier it is with just one kid at his side.

check out the smile on his first day of preschool

As parents of a first child to go to preschool it has been hard for us to let go a bit. There are times when we doubt our decision to put him in preschool, like when he came home 3 days in a row and told us one of the girls had been hitting him or when the teacher told us that J needs to learn to play being a nice superhero (not a mean one) or not act like Hulk (which was scaring some of the kids). But just as Olde and I get ready to talk to the teacher about these types of incidents J reports that that same girl is his girlfriend, or he raises his hand at the dinner table to talk, or he tells us he has to go wash his hands before he eats, or that he now wants to wear his big boy underwear like the other kids at preschool, so we decide that really it was the right decision to allow him to have his own thing every week, were he learns to sort out the kid world among his peers and learns the flow of working in a group in a "school" setting. The bottom line is that us parents are the ones struggling with the idea that our son is growing up, not him.

The Vaccine Debate

Another Healthy Baby!

I am soooo incredibly torn on the ethical debate about giving our kids vaccines. I survived for many years without getting the regular doses of shots that most kids in my generation did, since my parents claimed religious right to not get them when I entered public school. And yeah... I was from a small town in AK where I only came in contact with a few kids a year and the school was a one-room building---in other words, this kind of thing was totally accepted. You also have to remember that back when I was kid (which was not long ago) there were fewer shots --maybe a total of about 13--- that everyone had to get and now there are like 26 or maybe more that they, the American Pediatrics Association, recommend giving to kids before they turn 3 years old.

Nonetheless, I can see both sides for sure---I mean polio and a few other really nasty bugs no longer exist in this country or world, but when your little one looks all happy and then wham, a shot that leads to crying, and then they get that look like you betrayed them...ouch a stab to your heart for sure!

And... have you ever read what is in vaccines??? cow slurry, monkey tissue, live diseases...I kid you not, if you don't believe me check out from your local library, The Vaccine Book: Making the Right Decision for Your Child by Robert W. Sears, M.D., F.A.A.P.

At the end of a very long debate and many hours of research to make sure we were making the right choice for our first son, we ended up deciding it was better for the world and for us (considering we live in a very liberal metro area that if there was going to be an outbreak it would be here for sure) if a certain few were given. We did set some guidelines for the ones we choose to give: 
1) We designed our own schedule of when to administer them...Kaiser wanted to give a shot for Hep B---a sexually transmitted disease--- at birth, really Kaiser??? We said NO!
2) The shots had to have been around for a long while and shown a positive decrease in the disease---no Kaiser I will not give a pneumonia or flu shot to my infant that has only been on the market for a year.
 3) No more than 2 shots at once---sorry to say that the MMR, three-shot-in-one, is the only one that is an option at Kaiser so we still have give it---but not yet...we will wait until right before kindergarten.
4)  We give them only at the shot clinic at Kaiser so that J or Aram will not associate shots with Dr Fern, who is a great pediatrician, and her nurses.
5) Only give vaccines for illnesses that are very dangerous or have a higher incident of occurring---No chicken pox vaccine since we hope to find another kid to give it to our boys...I had it when I was young and I can tell you, although it was horrible, it was a kind of right of passage into the world of getting sick. In fact, I think most kids in my generation had them and remember them as horrible but important.
6). Bottom line We say when, where, what and how when giving shots---no convincing allowed!!!!

Even with all these "rules," I still struggle with giving them and Olde has to hold the boys when it occurs as I look away trying to play brave mommy. I think this is just part of being a parent---wearing a brave face even when you feel scared inside (more on this later).

Grandpops

All I can say is he really knows how to be that grandpa...He shows up with the most noisiest gifts (think keytar with annoying rifs and screeching microphone---see video below---- and I am sure we will own a drum set too in the near future) and always finds a way to give J sugar (see to the left) and then shrug the "What?" shrug. 

Just kidding Grandpops! well sort of ---all of the above are true :) as evidence from video and photo buuuuuttttttt......

Back when Jasper was just a pea inside of me he claimed that he would come for a visit when he could discuss Nietzsche with him, but you know what...he was here not even 7 days after J was born and same for Aram. He won't admit it but grand-babies make him all giggly and happy. His dedication to his grandsons is dutiful with weekend trips (16 hours of driving for a trip) our way just about any chance he gets and always with gifts for little ones.

But best of all are the visits to his cabin in the woods where we play among tall redwood trees, have bonfires, enjoy down time to the fullest, and ride on his John Deer mower. I think it is the best place for grandkids to play, maybe because I have such fond memories of playing outdoors among trees and in the dirt. I look forward to being able to drop the boys off and leaving for a weekend...that will be the ultimate pay back for the above mentioned grandfatherly duties.

Cold Chillin'

Man, Aram is such a chill baby. He will go anywhere and be held by anyone. We can take him to nice restaurants, hole in the wall places or on picnics, in the stroller or holding him, in a carrier, or car seat, rain or shine...no matter he is sooo happy! He will fall asleep on his own, especially if he is on the go. When he is hungry he does a little whimper but never lets it go totally like I hear other babies doing.

Big brother does not bother him unless he is doing a WWF move on his head---then we usually get some tears. It does not even bother him when J screams in his face or rocks him in his chair or tickles him...I mean he is so chill that I sometimes forget he is in the room when I am not holding him. 

How am I so lucky that both my babies were so easy? Does this mean that he will give me a really hard time later on...all I can say is, bring it son---you don't scare me I teach Special Ed!

Figuring Things Out

 Man co-parenting is sooooo hard...Old and I have had to learn to communicate all over again! About a year ago we just were dancing the dance of parenting without having to look down at our feet or count the steps in order to stay to the beat together....but then the second boy came and we had to relearn how to communicate...I mean you constantly have to talk to one another..."honey I am going pee--baby is on the couch and J is playing."  I mean really...do I really have to tell you my bowel movement needs---yep, it seems so. And then there is the more emotional talks like who's turn is it to put the kids to bed when you are dead tired or how to gracefully ask for time to yourself because you feel like you are going to scream if the kids don't stop pulling you in every way possible. Thankfully Olde is really good at making sure our communication is still going strong and he can read me really well (better than I tend to read his needs). I can't wait till we can dance again with out having to pay attention to it though!

Check out the skillz on this dada!